


Signs Of A Good Rick

by Rixxy8173571m3W1p3



Series: The Random Doofus Rick Tales [13]
Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Adorable Doofus Rick (Rick and Morty), Blind Date, Blue Eyes, Blushing, Candlelight, Crying, Dinner, Doofus Rick Being Sweet, F/M, Fear, Feels, Flirting, Getting to Know Each Other, Hugs, I Made Myself Cry, Men Crying, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Science, Substitute Date, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, talking nerdy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-15 21:51:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14798624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rixxy8173571m3W1p3/pseuds/Rixxy8173571m3W1p3
Summary: Dwc Prompt: I don't believe you! There's no such thing as a good rick!





	Signs Of A Good Rick

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hoodoo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hoodoo/gifts).



“Tidal power in - in particular offers a-a lot of promise since there is no shortage of coastline on which t-t-to build.”

“That's true,” you giggled. “but what a shame it would be if they use up a great chunk of lovely beach, leaving all those half naked seniors no space to look for seashells.”

“Hohoho, no it- it would be off shore, along the coast.”

Touching his hand, he blushed. “Really? Oh how wonderful.”

The flicker of candlelight highlighted all the happy lines of his face. His animated gestures adding life to his intellectual prose. You knew you could fall for him, and was relieved that the evening was going so well; that only happened 59.2% of the time. This Rick, J19Z7 was kind, smart, cute, and so attentive, but these words rung in your head as they usually would; _There's no such thing as a good rick!_

“Is - is something the matter?” he asked, interrupting your disquieting thoughts.

Pushing around your glass of wine, you admitted

“Oh, no I was just thinking is all. Please, tell me more about your ideas on renewable energy.”

Like 95.039% of the Ricks you have met in your lifetime, they were passionate and curious about science, metaphysics, and the unknown. And as he went on, you tried to put away your doubts. You have always had a preference for Ricks. They knew how to give you a good time, showing you star systems, give great gifts, and make you feel like a queen, but you weren't very good at picking them; they were all parasitic in the end. Sure, once they got what they wanted, they'd take and take some more, until you were an empty shell, and they'd move on to another host. 

There had been a few times when you met with a decent Rick, only to find that he was married or otherwise unavailable, but you had never been out with this kind of Rick; until today that is.

You were actually set up on a date with a guard Rick, but he flaked out and sent this so called Doofus Rick to meet you instead. Now, two hours of dinner, and dessert later, you were impressed; not only was he intelligent, he had many wonderful interests and mannerisms which you found endearing. Yet, even if he was unlike any of the others, he was still a Rick. He looked like a Rick, sounded like a Rick, and carried a portal gun; therefore a Rick.

* * *

 

Oh, you two had gotten to this part. 

Standing outside of your complex, he was ruminating on what to say; which was peculiar. Usually, Ricks…. they'd ask for a night cap, and you would try to feign innocence, which ended with disappointment, and blank memories. Wringing his hands, “Gosh, I-I-I enjoyed this,” and glancing between you and his hands, he said. “and you - you are a-a lovely woman. So,” he blushed, rocking on the balls of his feet. “I-I was wondering if I could - can I-I-I-I see you again?”

Ricks didn't blush, not so readily, and never with such innocence: that wasn't right. Ricks were forceful, they demanded, and they usually received; except for the undetermined percentage of them that had been killed even better the two of you met. They didn't ask nicely, and they certainly weren't monogamous; you had heard of rumors of this man, and thought they carried no weight to them. “What? You….. you want to see me again?”

“Yes,” he nodded. “I-I would like t-to very much.”

An echo, a lingering trace of a Rick. Everything you thought you knew was wrong. Backing away, you found your keys in your bag, and held it with all your might. “No, I…I don't believe you.”

Crestfallen, his whole body seemed to slump, “N-n-no, I-I-I did mean it, but I-I understand.” and letting out a sigh, he took out the flower he'd been hiding in his inner pocket. “Here, this is - it's for you. It's t-to thank you for - for having dinner with me. I'll just l-let you go.”

You waited, thinking that he would turn around, and curse you out like the last Rick had, then win you over with his charm like the rest, but he just kept on going. 

“That's it? You mean this isn't some kind of sick joke that you couldn't wait to tell all your friends?”

Without turning around, he stopped. “I-I-I don't - I don't really have any friends, except for m-my grandson.”

“Oh, then why did you come? I mean, you didn't have to, you weren't even the one I was set up with.”

“My coworkers told me I-I-I wasn't Rick enough for you, that - that y-you wouldn't like me. I thought I try something new, and I-I thought we were having a-a good time, but I….I guess I was wrong. I-I-I hope I didn't offend you in any way, it wasn't my intention, but I'm - I'm sorry if I did.”

Ricks didn't need to explain themselves, and they rarely did. If the occasion came, and they were humble enough to give reason why, then they were usually the type that could never be yours. “You….you didn't offend me,” you quickly replied, “you were nice, you paid for my meal, and you aren't asking for anything. Which in itself was strange, cause that's not what usually happens. Ricks,” you paused, the bloom of anxiety spreading across your chest. “they always want something, but not you. Are you… are you really a Rick?”

Finding the courage to face you, his electric blues searched you. “Yes, I am a Rick, from dimension J19ζ7. Yet, I'm not - I'm not like the other Ricks. In - in fact,” he sniffled. “I'm….. I'm the worst Rick of them all.”

And then he cried, big, fat, ugly tears, and his sobs wracked through his body like a wounded animal waiting to die. He wiped at his eyes, sobbing his heart out, and you thought your heart was going to break. He was an enigma, unlike any of the others, but he was still a Rick. However, this display of emotion, alien and foreign, made you unsure sure of what you saw. Another phrase came to mind, which was said by most Rick's you met; _Don't think about it!_

Yet, as you wrapped your arms around him, and waited until he calmed enough, you still had your doubts; _There's no such thing as a good rick!_

Your heart said one thing, and your mind another. “I'm sorry, I've….I've had a few bad experiences. I do want to see you,” you admitted. “like tomorrow or the day after that, or the day after that.”

“Really? Y-you mean it?” he brightened.

You always meant it. “If you want to.”

You have always had a preference for Ricks, and you were hoping that for once you had chosen right. Holding him tight, you heard him whisper. “I-I-I would - I would like t-to see you again.”


End file.
